Confrontive I-Messages in Action

Some successful examples of I-Messages between parent and child.

We use I-messages already, we just don’t call them that, for example when we want to explain to someone what we might need, or want to do in the future.

When we’re irritated by someone’s behaviour, we’re more likely to send a You-Message, which sounds accusatory and often implies unintended negative judgements. Not surprisingly You-Messages provokes resistance and defensiveness instead of the cooperation we were looking for!